Nasty Nasty Vitamins Online

OMG I just love talking about good health XOXOXO!!!! Go visit the best multivitamins for some awesome, awesome vitamin information.

Sorry for that little spat, now back to the typical vitriolic celebrity trash blog I had intended this to be (am I succeeding? Am I phrenetic? I’m trying, I really am). Anyway, young, female celebrities are constant targets for the like of unhealthy, un-vitamin informed people like Perez Hilton. And more often than not, these young ladies paint large targets on themselves…

Oh, what the hell am I doing? I don’t know anything about celebrity trash. I don’t follow rag mags. I’ve never even been on Perez Hilton’s website, I don’t even know his URL. As of this moment I’m changing this blog topic. I’ll make it about something else I know nothing about, but something that at least interests me to a mild degree.

This blog’s new topic: OLD HOTELS

That’s right, I’m fascinated by old hotels. There’s something charming about the history of a place where so many people have lived for a day. I’ve always wanted to write “Grand Palace” style story, something about the intertwining lives of people working at a hotel. Maybe something in the 1940′s. Right before (after?) World War II when everything was really swinging. Who knows? Might make for an interesting blog subject, at least for a few months.

I was working out at the gym the other day, and there was this dude walking around just handing out samples of vitamins.  I’m like “Yo!” what I’m I going to do with a handful of vitamins in the middle of a workout?! I don’t have a water bottle to wash them down with, and I certainly am not going to tote them around in my bad where they’ll smell up my clothes with that bittery vitamin odor. No way, Priscilla!

Besides, I’ve already got my own brand of vitamins I buy online. I don’t need some doped up, post college athlete trying to eek out a living at me while I just want to run on my elliptical machine!

Sometimes healt is just too much to deal with, you know what I’m saying, honey?

I visit a new health blog every day, trying to find something that fits me, but it seems that every diet either wants me to totally cut the fat (sorry, I love the meat, yeah, you know it), or it totally wants me to cut the sugar (sorry, I love the Starbucks, can’t live without it, Boo Yeah!). Isn’t there something with a little bit of both worlds.

Thank god I’m not fat, but sometimes I feel skinny fat. You know what that is, right? It’s like a thin boned person with some flab, the nerd who’s not in shape. Yeah, that’s me.

I read about something called a paleo diet recently, maybe that’s my answer. Who knows. TTY in a month!

Kristy Yamaguchi won dancing with the stars last night, the bitch. I hate her more than I hate Disney. What am I saying, I love her, I want to wrap her in cartoon puppies and watch her tip toe through a vegetable garden.

The skinny blade master was beautiful and graceful and masterful on the dance flooor. We should have known she’d win from day one. She spent 9 hours a day from the age of 3 dancing on ice and won a god damned olympic medal for it, we should known she’d be all the better when her dance floor was less slippery.

One thing I must say, she has aged well. When she was plastered on wheaties boxes back in the early 90′s and making token appearances at Disney parades, I always thought she looked spare, like someone had bound her feet up and fed her cold pouridge all her youth. But now, she’s got looks like a model! And not the wafy models of yesteryear, but the newer athletic models that are quick becoming the fashion.

So, congrats, girl. You deserve it. You beat out all the hunky latin men with washboard abs. The only shameful thing about this is that the tweens of today probably will only remember Yamaguchi as “that asian girl who won Dancing with the Stars” rather than the great Olympian she worked her whole life to be. It seems even sports heroes aren’t real heroes today unless they are celebrutantes as well. It seems if a female athlete wants to shine, she must do a Maxim spread, have an affair with a coked out rockstar, or make a viral porn video. If you don’t believe me, just look at professional womens’ tennis.

Finally, if you want to be just like Kristy Yamaguchi, start drinking that weight loss shake! And head over to this omega 3 benefits page for more info on fish oil capsules, the stuff of champions!

Can you believe this business with Miley Cyrus.

I personally can’t stand what she stands for, the Disneyfication of America, whole hearted Christian goodness and all the buffoonery. It’s sweetness to vomitting level. But the girl herself is adorable, and friendly, and kind in interviews which is become rarer and rarer in today’s celebritrash psycho-peroxide world.

So, Hannah Montana isn’t worth a pile of Vogue Magazines, but Miley Cyrus is.

And then Annie Liebowitz goes and exploits her. The girl is fifteen, prone to obey and follow her elders, and of course she is pimped for publicity appearing on magazine covers in photo shoots et al. And What sells more than nudity, so Leibowitz goes and shoots nude pictures of Cyrus holding a sheet in front of her. She’s fifteen for God’s sake! BARF!

This reminds me of that orthorexia nervosa post I read a few weeks ago. Not a bad health post, but equally as disturbing. Finally, visit people search public records for all your public records search engine needs.

Shameless plug OMG!

I have this friend from college who started his own clothing store. Only 23 years old and he’s already got a fashionable retail supply out in Seattle.

Basically, it’s an apparell collective for the fashionably wealthy gay class. That might be a bit redundant as typically the wealthy gay are fashionable and the wealthy fashionable are gay. The fashionably gay aren’t always wealthy but most likely they will be someday. My friend is 23, and he’s all 3.

He travels to New York a few times a year to check out the latest trends. I kid you not when I say new fashionistas and designers actually line up at his hotel room door to show off their latest fashions. There’s a bevy of vampiric-sexy-thin models who hang around him, despite the fact that all his clothes are for men.

I went to his website recently to find something to buy and I couldn’t find a thing under $50. Not even the underwear!!!

So I bought a $70 pair of boxers, and god damnit, they feel like $70. If you’re wealthy, go to the Marqsmen store and buy the shit out of his clothes.

Also if you’re wealthy, buy the shit out of some vitamins. Buy vitamin called the Master Formula, it’s god damned expensive, but it’s simply the best!

I watched the British Academy Awards the other night. I don’t know why I even  bothered they ewere so gross. The main dude was some sort of john Stewart rip off trying to be “industry” funny but he kept falling flat, then he would apologize for falling flat which we all know is a big FOPAW.

Anyway, the awards were dick, and pretty much wrong, but the thing that really twisted my buttons was Tilda Swinton’s dress. She was like a fucking Beetle ride at a Disney amusement park. It looked like some kids were about to stick a quarter in her and ride her while mom’s inside buying groceries.

The dress was a yellow abortion puffing over her form. The body was totally usurped by the dress. A polar bear could have worn the outfit and looked exactly the same. And I say this in pity because I truly like Tilda, I thought her performance in Michael Clayton was mesmerizing, and I hope she wins the big boy Oscar.

My brain was still reeling in disgust when that skinny bitch from la vie en rose got up to accept her fake oscar. She was even worse! Her outfit looked— I diarrhea shit you not– like it had been made of napkins. She was wearing napkins. God, I hope the Oscars aren’t this bad.

Enough bitching, time for health jism! Check out this post on how to relieve stress, then head on over to the vitamin shop. And that’s all of me for this month, folks. C-ya!

How’s it going bitches and bitchettes. That’s right, I just femenized a word already relegated to women, that’s the kind of ho bag semanticist I am, making up words like a drunk crack baby.

I’m ushering in a new wave. Post femenist. Post, post femenist femenine. It’s the new femenisinity, and it’s what women are becoming.

No, I am not a woman, but that’s all the better, the new era of the woman is going to be so far reaching, indulgent, and culture changing that even men can be part of the new women.

That’s my spew and I’m sticking to it, at least until next week when I’m back on how F’ing dangerous E is, but why it’s SO worth it if the party is boring and you’ve brought midwestern relatives along.

Peace, peoples!